Kansas City Royals: A horror movie for each season of the past decade
By Cullen Jekel
2016
Kansas City Royals: 81-81
Movie: 2013’s The Conjuring
A season after winning 95 games, capturing the American League Central, and winning the World Series, the Royals fell back to earth, barely breaking even at 81-81, a 14-win drop from the year before and missing the playoffs for the first time since 2013.
That wasn’t the plan. Instead, the Royals, despite losing several key players like Ben Zobrist and Johnny Cueto, were supposed to again contend for a playoff spot. 2015 wasn’t supposed to be the end, but it turned out to be, as 2016 didn’t go as planned.
The terror came swiftly.
Like Insidious, The Conjuring was directed by James Wan, starred Patrick Wilson, and told the story about a terrorized family. But this time it’s the house that’s haunting the Perron family, and Wilson is one half of a couple in charge of saving the family. The great Vera Farmiga stars opposite Wilson while Lili Taylor and Ron Livingston play Carolyn and Roger Perron, a married couple with several children looking to give their kids a great house in which to grow up.
The terror came swiftly.
One particular scene captures the essence of not only The Conjuring but also the 2016 Kansas City Royals, a team thought capable of still competing but that was really stuck in the dark. Taylor’s Carolyn hears someone running around the house and decides to investigate. Which, as all of us who are familiar with “nightmare logic” can tell you right now is a bad move.
After that, the Perrons just want to focus on exorcising the house and saving their daughters. Just like the Royals wanted to get out of 2016 and focus on one last ride with their core group of players in 2017.
Nothing ever goes as planned, does it?